Parents and carers sometimes describe a child as “stubborn” because the child appears to understand an instruction but does not follow it. Before assuming that a child is choosing to be difficult, it can help to ask what might be making the situation hard for them.
Could the child have misunderstood the words? Are the instructions too long or abstract? Do they need more time to process what they have heard? Are they struggling to find the words to explain their feelings, or are noise, stress and sensory demands affecting their ability to respond?
Sometimes, behaviour that looks like defiance may be connected to an unrecognised speech, language and communication need (SLCN). Looking at communication as well as behaviour can help adults understand what a child needs and identify the right support.
What are speech, language and communication needs?
Speech, language and communication needs describe difficulties with understanding or using speech, language and communication. These difficulties can affect how a person understands information, expresses ideas, remembers spoken information, follows sequences, solves problems and takes part in conversations.
A child with SLCN may find it difficult to understand concepts, abstract language, idioms, metaphors or sentences with more than one possible meaning. They may also struggle with language about time, such as “before,” “after” or “last year.” Some children have difficulty finding the right words, putting sentences together or retelling events in the correct order. Others may need additional support to remember and process information presented verbally.
Communication profiles vary considerably. A child may speak confidently in familiar situations but find longer explanations, unfamiliar vocabulary, multi-step instructions or questions requiring an explanation of their reasoning much more difficult.
SLCN may be described as a hidden or invisible disability because the difficulties are not always obvious. A child may appear intelligent and articulate, or may develop ways of masking their difficulties, while still struggling to understand or use language in more demanding situations.
When behaviour may be communicating a difficulty
Behaviour is communication, but it does not always tell us immediately what a child is trying to communicate. A child who walks away, refuses an activity, becomes upset or appears not to listen may be communicating that they are confused, overwhelmed, worried, tired, unable to express themselves, or unsure what will happen next.
Communication needs may be especially difficult to recognise when a child can hold a simple conversation. A child may appear to understand because they nod, use familiar phrases or answer straightforward questions, but this does not always mean that they have understood every instruction or concept.
Instead of asking only, “Why is this child being difficult?”, adults can also ask:
- What has the child understood?
- Could the language be simplified?
- Have we given the child enough time to process the information?
- Are there too many steps in the instruction?
- Could noise, movement, anxiety or sensory demands be affecting the child’s response?
- What support would help the child take part?
These questions do not mean that boundaries and expectations are unnecessary. Rather, they help adults make sure that expectations are communicated in a way the child can understand and act upon.
How can SLCN affect learning and participation?
A child with SLCN may miss important information, find it difficult to follow instructions, or need additional support to join group activities. Difficulties with language can also affect problem-solving, recalling events, explaining what happened and understanding the consequences of an action.
This does not mean that a child cannot learn or participate. It means that the way information is presented may need to be adapted. The UK Government and Youth Justice Board guidance explains that SLCN can affect a young person’s ability to engage with requirements and verbally delivered interventions.
Support may be particularly important when children or young people are expected to understand unfamiliar, abstract or technical language. In justice settings, for example, difficulties with legal vocabulary, listening, recalling information and sequencing a story may affect a young person’s ability to participate fully.
Communication needs and youth justice
Speech, language and communication needs are highly prevalent among young people involved in the youth justice system. The Royal College of Speech and Language Therapists reports that over 60% of young people in justice settings have SLCN. The available estimates depend on the setting, the population studied and the screening or assessment method used, and the Youth Justice Board has noted limitations in the available data.
This statistic should not be interpreted to mean that SLCN causes offending. Young people’s experiences are complex, and communication needs may exist alongside many other factors, including trauma, exclusion from education, mental health needs, neurodivergence, family circumstances and social disadvantage.
However, when communication needs are unidentified or unsupported, police interviews, court proceedings, appointments and verbally delivered programmes may be difficult to understand. A young person may struggle to explain events, follow instructions, understand legal vocabulary or demonstrate what they know. Communication support can help professionals communicate more effectively and help young people participate in services and proceedings.
How can speech and language therapists help?
Speech and language therapists (SLTs) can work with children, families, schools and other professionals to understand how communication affects a child’s participation and behaviour. Depending on the individual’s needs, an SLT may:
- assess how a child understands and uses communication;
- identify language, processing, interaction or communication barriers that may affect behaviour;
- help adults use clear, accessible language and visual supports;
- support a child to understand routines, expectations and choices;
- develop individualised communication strategies and support plans; and
- adapt written or verbally delivered education and intervention programmes so that the child can participate more fully.
SLTs may provide direct therapy, consultation, staff training or advice to families and professionals. In justice settings, the RCSLT describes roles including screening, assessment, personalised planning, direct intervention, consultation, staff training and adapting information to improve access.
Support should be developed collaboratively with the child and family. It should complement, not replace, appropriate educational, health, safeguarding or behaviour support.
Helpful approaches at home and in school
Adults can often make communication easier by reducing background distractions, using short and clear instructions, presenting one step at a time, allowing extra processing time, checking understanding and using visual information alongside spoken instructions.
It may also help to offer appropriate movement or sensory breaks and to provide predictable routines. These approaches should be adapted to the individual child and discussed with their family, school or relevant professional.
Listening does not look the same for every child. Sitting still, looking directly at a speaker or responding immediately should not be treated as universal measures of attention or understanding. The most important question is whether the child has access to the information and the support they need to participate.
When should I seek advice?
You may wish to seek advice from a speech and language therapist if you are concerned that your child:
- often misses or does not understand spoken instructions;
- finds it difficult to shift attention between activities;
- becomes overwhelmed by noise, movement or other distractions;
- needs significant support to participate in group activities;
- finds it difficult to explain feelings, events or needs;
- appears to understand simple conversation but struggles with longer or more complex language; or
- is not making progress, taking their individual circumstances into account.
These signs do not, by themselves, provide a diagnosis or automatically mean that therapy is needed. An assessment can help identify your child’s strengths, understand their individual needs and determine what support may be useful.
How can I access support?
If you are concerned about your child’s communication, learning or behaviour, please complete our enquiry form. A member of our team will contact you as soon as possible to discuss your concerns and explain the next steps.
You can also contact us directly:
Email: [email protected] or [email protected]
Telephone: 07388940466
Our team can discuss your concerns and explain how speech and language therapy may be able to help.
References
[1]: Royal College of Speech and Language Therapists: Where SLTs work – justice settings (rcslt.org/speech-and-language-therapy/where-slts-work/justice/)
[2]: Youth Justice Board and Royal College of Speech and Language Therapists: Practice advice on SLCN in the youth justice system (gov.uk)